PREPARATION

The concept of forgiveness has been the news lately. When will Tiger Woods find forgiveness? Will baseball fans across America forgive Mark McGwire for his confessed use of steroids in his quest for the Home Run Title? And, what will it take for John Edwards to get forgiveness for fathering a love child? But forgiveness isn't found in a press release, nor is it created with a catchy new slogan.

Without forgiveness you are stuck with festering wounds of betrayal and humiliation, or the corrosiveness of disgrace and dishonor, or the unwillingness to turn loose of hoarded hurts. How do you recover from what could have been?

Forgiveness is a choice--an exceptional and misunderstood course of action. Some would label it crazy or a symbol of brain damage.

Jesus spoke often about forgiveness. It was and is a deal-breaker part of this Kingdom. Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven. Luke 6:37 NIV

This forgiveness is not just limited to the public failures and private indiscretions; it reaches down to all the "minor" installments that have been stacked away in our pain bank. Choosing to forgive is not easy.

As I see it, there are two dangerous forgiveness myths that need to be busted: 1. Forgiving someone means you condone what they did (Get that out of your head). 2. Forgiveness depends on whether the person who did you wrong apologizes, wants you back, or changes his or her ways (Forgiveness means you turn loose of this mess regardless of what the other person wants or does).

Three things happen when a Christian forgives: 1. God is honored, 2. Grace is experienced, 3. Brokenness is healed. You can be a forgiving person because God has given you the power. You can forgive someone else because God has forgiven you. He has shown you the way. When you choose to refuse to hurt the person who has hurt you, you write a story of grace over a bottomless pit of festering pain. And, your choice not only release the person who has wronged you, but it unleashes the best in you.

Ready for the real world? Debbie loved life. She and her best friend, Robin, were twirlers together and joined at the hip. High school was their world. But, in August of 1975 everything changed.

After an argument with her mother Debbie stormed out of the house and wasn't heard from for days. Betty, Debbie's mother, thought maybe her daughter had run away.

After days of agony, the police found Debbie's 16 year-old body in a nearby creek. She had been raped and strangled.

After months of frustration, Betty took up the investigation. "I saw something in the newspaper," said Betty. "The wire that was embedded around Debbie's neck, wrists and ankles was copper-coated wire. I remember hearing the police say that."

With the help of a private detective Betty tied the wire to Debbie's favorite high school English teacher, Raymond Payne. Months later the police followed up and matched wire. Payne was arrested.

He pleaded guilty to a homicide charge, but was convicted of first-degree murder and sentenced to life in prison.

Hatred consumed Betty like poison. "I hated him more than I hated anyone in my life," Betty said. "I dragged that hate with me everywhere I went."

Her unwillingness to forgive was distorting her life. She was in a prison without bars, but a prison just the same. Then, six years after Debbie's death, Betty made a startling decision. She chose to forgive Ray.

Betty visited Payne in prison to tell him about her decision. The guard opened the door, and Ray came into the room. She opened her arms, and he opened his arms, and they stood there in the middle of room, hugging and crying.

God was honored, grace was experienced, and brokenness was healed. Consequences continued, but the pit of bitterness emptied.

INSPIRATION

In the summer of 1993 Reginald Denny drove his truck into the riots of South Central Los Angeles. He was stopped at the intersection of Florence and Normandie when two men jumped him pulled him from his truck, beat him with a broken bottle, and kicked him till both sides of his face were caved in. All the while, video cameras in the helicopter above captured every detail.

Months later at the close of the trial, as the two men were being led away from the courtroom, Denny pulled a surprise move.

Defying the advice of his own lawyers, Denny walked over to the mothers of the two defendants and hugged them. He told them that he had chosen to forgive their sons. Tears filled the eyes of everyone in the room. 

God was honored, grace was experienced, and brokenness was healed.

One commentator responded "Well you know Denny did suffer some brain damage." Forgiveness doesn’t make sense, but, oh, how we need it.
 

MOTIVATION 

Isn't it past time to release your hoarded stash of resentment and bitterness and buried anger? God sent his Son, to forgive you, to show you what it takes to forgive others, regardless. It's your choice. Choose to honor God, experience grace, and heal brokenness. Or...

Tell me what God is leading you to do.